Being in a partnership entails learning to know each other especially. You may feel like you’re “baring everything” and knowing all there is to know about each other in the early stages of your relationship. But have you shared your thoughts and behaviors about expenditure and saving?
Money–how you make it, invest it, save it, handle it, and learn about it–isn’t the most exciting subject of discussion, but it’s crucial! For several spouses today using the “what’s yours is mine” strategy in a partnership, you’ll want to be sure you’re mindful of any significant obligations or liabilities before investing too deeply in the relationship.
When you weigh commuting costs and other expenses that come with dating someone that doesn’t live in the same city, long-distance relationships will bring an additional layer of financial burden. In these cases, one person often ends up investing more than the other to maintain the relationship alive, which may place a burden on the relationship (not to mention their bank balance).
Talking about money early and frequently will help to avoid misunderstandings and frustrations and ensure that you and your partner are on the same page. But how do you broach the subject? Date night with a money chat!
Hosting a money talk date night is a perfect way to ease into the financial discussion without becoming too intrusive. These free printable games make it simple to discuss money in a lighthearted yet thoughtful manner. Continue reading for more details about how to host a money talk game night:
Money Talking Games
Classics like Never Have I Ever and Would You Rather are given a financial twist in these free printable games. These games may be played in person, through video chat, or over the internet, making them ideal for long-distance couples.
Why do you want to play money games in the first place? These games will help expose your partner’s potential desires and goals, as well as reveal financial pressures from the past.
Once you’ve eased into the discussion with a friendly game, you can use these 24 money and finance conversation starter questions to speed up the money talk with questions like “Did your family have enough money while you were growing up?”
Respect the Distinctions
On your money talk date night, you can most definitely discover any gaps between your and your partner’s financial perspectives. Unless there are big warning flags (such as all of these indications that you might be getting scammed in a rom-com), there is no reason to panic quite yet: nearly everybody has a different relationship to money than the people around them.
It’s also necessary to note that self-reflection will lead to transformation and management. If something troubling is found through the conversation––for example, a large liability your wife has been hiding––remember that all types of financial arrangements should be adjusted and controlled. It may not have to be the end of the friendship. It is, though, something to consider since money is one of the most prevalent causes of tension and friction in long-term relationships.
Recognize and respect the financial disparities in your partnership and foster fair and transparent contact. Tell your spouse what you value in their financial partnership, such as “I love how you focus investing money on your interests” or “I love how you are planning for a potential target you want to accomplish.” Also, be forthright about any questions you should have.
Establish Goals and Boundaries
It’s not unusual for two individuals to have opposing opinions on expenditure and investing, so don’t be alarmed if this describes you and your partner– it’s not a deal-breaker! In reality, it may be an incentive for the two of you to set financial targets together. If you find that you are a saver and your wife is a spender, this is an excellent chance to practice your negotiation and compromise skills. Strengthen the relationship by setting shared financial targets that are beneficial to both of you. What might be more personal than cracking open a bottle of wine and whispering about your savings plans all night?! (OK, they may not find it as fascinating as you do, however, you should be able to make it worthwhile for them and, uh, incentivize them to save?)
There’s no doubt that long-distance marriages come with additional costs; your money talk date night is the ideal time to explore these limits. How much money will you afford to invest per month? How much can you drive to visit one another? What is the most money you’ll ever waste on a plane ticket? There are crucial boundaries to establish early on to alleviate financial stress and avoid potential miscommunications. For example, knowing your travel budgets makes things simpler to handle assumptions about how often you’ll see each other.
So, when do you bring up the subject of money? Every pair is unique, and although we suggest starting early and revisiting frequently, we’d love to hear your opinions! When do you think it’s necessary to bring up the subject of money in a long-distance relationship?